Crappy Talk Two

I always wonder what people think about me. Do they look at me as an ugly girl or cute girl? Do they look at me as a good girl or as an annoying person. Annoying? I get that a lot you know, from everyone around me. Do they mean it or its just a joke. Anyway I always thought its just a joke until a few years ago, someone tell me that I annoyed him much and I don't know why, but it hurts to hear that. Hearing him said the word is just different, I feel embarrasse and a little hurt. I moved on but sometimes when I think of it, it makes me hate him so much. But still, he's a friend of mine until now. I wonder if he ever think of me as a good friend. Well I helped him a lot and listen to his problem and try to help him get through some of his tough time but is it good enough to satisfy him? Even when he treated me coldly, I still try to cheer him up and whenever he say something that hurt my feeling, I try to not stay mad at him coz he is after all the only friend that understands me (sometimes). HEH enough of this crappy talk. BTW we're just friends, nothing more or less. He's taken.